books

August 3, 2019 0 comments

How amazing are we?

Note: this post may contain affiliate links, which means I receive a commission if you purchase through the link. I only link to products I use and love.

Today’s self-care idea is another gratitude practice. I hope it does not seem redundant; I believe we cannot spend too much effort reminding ourselves the beauty that surrounds us; doing so is an important aspect of nourishing, enriching, and healing our souls. Each weekend, as our family routines slow down and I have more space in my day for intention, my mind turns to appreciating the gifts around me.

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I multiply the power of this focus with a mealtime ritual inspired by the words of Thich Nhat Hanh. In the book Inter-Being, Hanh describes the process of linking together all of the historic events which have led to the moment that you are experiencing. Being nurtured by eating is a perfect opportunity to recognize the farmers, truck drivers, store owners, sun and rain and soil, the parents of all the workers and their grandparents throughout time, all of the relationships and resources that nurtured each of them, the legacy of plant biology necessary to produce the seeds, the crafters or factory laborers who created the tools, furniture, and fabrics that you are using to eat, all of those individual’s ancestors and everything and everyone who contributed to those lives; the materials, equipment, and human work needed to build all of the structures and transportation infrastructure involved.

When sharing this fullness with my younger child, I often simplify enormity to three or five key elements, while in my own brain I hold the expansive version.

Contemplating these factors ignites a sense of wonder at my place in the universe – even the geology and astronomic forces that have impacted the formation of our planet play a part. Considering all this, there is very little chance that any piece of the entire world going backward infinitely has not somehow influenced the current state of my reality. It also brings into my awareness my role in the future of humanity and global ecology. That is an awesome, magical feeling. I hope you can find time to realize the same sensation.

With Love and Kindness,
Anne

June 23, 2019 0 comments

Prioritizing your time as a parent / caregiver

Note: this post may contain affiliate links, which means I receive a commission if you purchase through the link. I only link to products I use and love.

This book recommendation may seem a bit off topic, but honestly it has provided me with so much “getting back on track” that I couldn’t be the parent I am without having read it.

Planning your day: follow the compass, not the clock.

The idea of designating my time in terms of roles and goals has been instrumental in keeping me balanced as a person (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual), as a friend, a family member, a community member, a co-worker, and – at this time in my life – most importantly a parent.

The other concept that has guided and righted my ship numberous (haha that’s a great typo) times is the quadrant planning tool. The most significant aspect of it is noticing those things in our life that are not pressing or urgent, but are IMPORTANT. I am the Queeeeen of putting all of my ASAP tasks behind anything with an actual deadline, and all of my important tasks somewhere between Rainbow Bright and the Care Bears*.

Note: If you did not grow up in the 80’s, first of all I am so sorry, what a bummer, if there’s anything I can do to help please let me know; second, *what I mean is that those dreams are (or were, until I read this book) in the clouds.

One additional piece of advice – not directly from this book, but combined with some wisdom from my mom (thanks mom!) – that has shaped my self-concept was to recognize that one cannot “Get an A”, ie. do their best work as a parent, a housekeeper, a student, a partner… all at the same time. Many colleges now even frown upon 4.0 GPAs because it is ~~impossible~~ highly improbable to achieve that while also being creative and social and all of the other soft skills that are required to be a productive worker sustainably. (Obviously there are exceptions to any impossibilities. Especially if one goes to a really cool school that values real values.)

I’m not at all advocating for just letting the rest of your life go to heck so you can be a good parent, because the stress of a mucked up life is not good for parenting, but just to give yourself grace when you fall short a bit in one area or another, recognize the juggling act you are attempting, and know that you are doing your best. Or, if you really feel you are not, re-calibrate.

Take some time for yourself to map out new strategies, and ask for help if needed. I realize that it often takes an enormous amount of strength to reach out when you are struggling. If you are not sure who or how to ask for help, please get in touch and I will do my best help you figure it out or find someone who can!

May 21, 2019 0 comments

Helping bedtime go smoothly

As I’ve been working to smooth our getting home-dinner-bedtime routine, I’ve been reminded of the importance of consistent expectations. We have a visual chart for our before bed activities (bath, jammies, stories, teeth, snuggle). Any time I attempt to deviate from the plan (say, by skipping bath because it’s late), I (we all) pay later!

One of my super fave resources right now is Whole Family Rhythms. Meagan has the most gorgeous printables for designing your family’s daily and weekly routines and menu plans, and also just a wealth of information on conscious, reflective, respectful parenting and family life. I am currently working with her summer season guide, and have previously used the “Return to rhythm” and several other resources.

*Note – The WholeFamilyRhythms site is taking a break for the summer, so I’m not sure you’ll be able to purchase anything at the moment, but definitely sign up for the email list, and I will also let you know here when she’s back up and running!

Update: The Guides are now available as FREE downloads! It’s still set up as a shopping cart, so you’ll need to enter some personal information to check out. Super excited to explore the Winter and Spring guides!

A favorite book from my first child’s childhood is Rabbit’s Bedtime by Nancy Elizabeth Wallace. (You can click the link to purchase from your local bookstore!)

I’m still working on figuring out the required disclosures about affiliate links; in the meantime I’ll just let you know that I’ve signed up for an account with IndieBound (it’s like an Amazon link but instead it goes to a local bookstore). Shop your local indie bookstore.